PITTSFIELD, Mass. — NAMI of Berkshire County celebrated community advocates and gave its annual report on how the organization has been navigating troubling times.
The local affiliate of the National Alliance on Mental Illness held its annual meeting on Tuesday at Zucchini's Restaurant.
The guest speaker was newly elected board member Kayla Allen, who is the director of the dispute center for Upside413, formerly known as Berkshire Housing Authority.
Allen described Upside 413's dispute resolution work, which grew from housing services and now includes mediation in schools, agriculture, re-entry, family and workplace disputes. She explained that a mediator helps people have difficult conversations in which they can feel heard and respected.
When she was asked to speak for the event, she said she didn't know what to talk about but thought she should discuss the idea of navigating differences in really challenging times.
"I'm a mediator, and I've been doing this work for over a decade. And so I sit in spaces with individuals who are in conflict all day, every day, and I've learned a lot from that," Allen said. "I've learned a lot about conflict, and I've also learned a lot about people through that. And so I was hoping to share a little bit about what I've learned in this work with you all tonight."
She framed conflict as a signal that something important such as a need, relationship, or sense of fairness may not be addressed. Conflict can feel especially intense when someone's words seem to challenge a valued part of one's identity. That perceived threat can lead people to defend themselves, stop listening, or lash out, she said, giving the example of someone saying to her that she never listens to them.
She recommended people to take a step back and instead of defending themselves ask what made them feel that way as well as asking whether someone wants advice or simply wants to be heard.
"I am a good listener. I know this about myself. I have to instead, what I call, complexify my identity. So that means that two things can be true. Life is complex. Humans are complex. Everything is a little messy all the time," Allen said. "So I can be a good listener, and I may not have listened well in that conversation. That would be the reality. I can deeply care about someone and say something that hurts them, not intentionally, but that's what can happen."
Allen emphasized that understanding someone does not require agreeing with them or abandoning a boundary. Her principle is to be "hard on the problem while being soft on the people." She connected this to mental health: a diagnosis or a moment of crisis can provide information, but does not define a whole person. She closed with the thought that conflict is inevitable, but combat is optional.
"I think what we can do is have a little more choice in how we show up when conflict does, and so when we're living in a time right now where we're being pulled toward certainty about one another, about being pulled toward sides, toward reducing people to something they said or the label we've given them, no one is always anything," she said. "Not me, not the person I'm in conflict with, not the person having the worst day of their life. And so, not every difficult conversation will end in agreement, not every conflict will be resolved.
"But there's real power in understanding one another a little better, and particularly in a time where we feel so polarized, I think there's real power in continuing to see the person."
Incorporated in 1984, the non-profit's mission is to improve the quality of life for local residents with mental illness and their families through support, education, and advocacy.
Board President Ruth Healy explained the year's accomplishments and challenges. She said the organization's support groups are free and accessible to anyone but that the Peer Connections are currently on hold as a facilitator has to be trained.
She was invited to join the nominating subcommittee of NAMI Massachusetts Board board to interview and select candidates to join the board.
"I was really honored that they reached out to me and asked me to be a part of that. It shows that they are respecting what's going on out here. So I think it's good for us to feel like we have more of a voice than we did the last few years," Healy said.
Ruthie said total revenue and support was a little over $41,000, about $18,000 lower than the previous year, while event revenue was up 10 percent.
She said grants fell 20 percent, primarily because NAMI was no longer eligible for Berkshire and Northern Berkshire United Way funding.
Expenditures were over $32,000 and nearly $17,000 lower than last year, largely because NAMI no longer had paid staff and is fully board-driven. Programming and event expenses increased 16 percent. The organization reported a surplus of a little over $8,000, compared with a little over $10,000 the prior year.
The night ended with the awards to three individuals for their contributions to the community.
The Eunice E. Zorbo Member of the Year Award went to Healy for her tireless work with the organization.
"Ruth has served as an absolute pillar of our organization. Ruth started as board secretary in 2010, and from there she went on to different roles and eventually to board president," said board Vice President Beth Persing. "Her impact can be felt from everything that she does, from writing retitle grants, helping to create the youth well-being fair, to ruling up her space to tackle whatever task needs to get done. She works tirelessly and with pure compassion.
"Her spirit extends to every corner of her life, from her daily customer service role at Big Y, serving our neighbors, and her devotion to her family and her dogs."
The Eunice E. Zorbo Citizen of the Year Award was presented Deborah Sadowy, past president, for her commitment to the organization.
"Deb came up with the idea at one of our board meetings for a fundraising event, and she called it Cupcake Wars, and it's still going strong all these years later, and I can easily say that due to Deb's brainchild, it has brought in probably about $200,000 over all of those years." Healy said. "Deb is a joy. If you don't know her, you should get to know her. And for those who do know her, she is so kind and compassionate and dedicated to whatever she does. And it was an honor serving under her as board president."
Sadowy credited the board and volunteers for making the event successful and led an activity in which attendees formed a connected circle, emphasizing coming together despite differences and contributing to NAMI.
"I just wanted you to keep this moment in mind that together, all of us as human beings, we can do anything, so we can make NAMI strong, and keep it going as it has been for many many years. Let's see it continue on many many more years. I thank you all for being here. I thank you all for supporting NAMI, and please please continue," Sadowy said.
The final award, Silver Ribbon Mental Health Advocate, went to Maureen Logan, director of Wellness & Community Health for Berkshire Health Systems.
"Her job as director of community health and wellness it's all about outward thinking, right? This is all about the work that she does in the community, and that work is not Monday through Friday, 9 to 5. I don't know how many nights and weekends you and your team have put in, but she does it with a smile, with such goodness, and her heart is so big, and she cares so much about how people are, how they're doing, and I think the perfect job for you," said Anthony Scibelli, her colleague and BHS vice president and chief operating officer of Fairview Hospital.
"In the sense that the wellness part of her job many organizations sort of don't focus on this stuff, and Maureen's work to be able to do such preventative work and to be out in the community. We're just so grateful for someone like that."
Logan said she was thrilled and grateful for the work NAMI does, and also thrilled to be recognized.
"I love the work I get to do, and it is really the work I get to do. Mental health is health, so when we think about looking out for people who they are doesn't matter, doesn't matter who they are, but to reach out and touch them that's super important for all of us to be thinking about all the time. So thank you," she said.