LEE, Mass. — Authors and sisters Erin Connor and Katie Wood used contrasting stories from their own athletic careers to drive home their point to student-athletes at Lee High School on Tuesday afternoon.

 

Connor and Wood are the authors of "Better Stronger You (Bet On You)," a self-help book designed to help athletes develop an "elite mindset" that allows them to focus on the positives in their lives and personal growth.

 

To hammer their point home, Connor told the teenagers how, when she was in her shoes, she allowed negativity to hold her back from pursuing Division I college athletics. And, when she attended Division II Stonehill College, she ended up allowing those same negative thoughts to drive her from sports altogether.

 

"I went on my run, and I stopped mid-run," Connor said, describing part of her pre-season training. "And all of a sudden, that loud voice came back in my head, and it said, 'You aren't good enough. You don't deserve to play at Stonehill. You can't even finish this run.'

 

"And I quit. I quit on the team I committed to and my college. I quit on a bad day"

 

Wood referenced her sister's experience when she talked about her time at Providence College, where she did not even plan to compete for the Division I Friars. During a pickup basketball game, she was encouraged by the college's women's basketball coach to go out for the team as a walk-on.

 

After two years of sitting on the bench but working as hard as she could in practice, Wood got a chance to play significant minutes late in her sophomore season and earned a full scholarship for her final two years with the program, she said.

 

"My small mindset wanted to quit so many times," Wood said. "And I was so lucky that I had people in my life who kept making me push myself.

 

"The coach looked me in the eye and granted me a full scholarship for two years and named me captain on the spot because of my attitude, my effort, my resiliency and my determination to keep going. And that can outweigh skill and talent alone."

 

Wood said that was the kind of "Bet On You" mentality that she and Connor are encouraging.

 

"Erin's story — she wasn't lucky to have a coach who believed in her," Wood said. "No one really helped her bounce back after the negative spiral that came into her life. I also had the negative spiral. We all do. Every person in the world does. If you think you're alone with the negative thoughts, you're not. We all have them.

 

"We are so passionate about teaching 'Bet On You' mentality, because it has to be up to you. You don't know what coach you're going to have. You may not have the most supportive parents. You may not have the best friend support. You need to learn how to bet on yourself, and that is going to take you so far."

 

Connor and Wood gave the student-athletes copies of their book and explained how to use it as a tool for journaling to learn the 'Bet On You' mentality.

 

The book is organized around 65 daily lessons and a companion workbook page with prompts designed to help the user access the reticular activating system of their brain to filter out distractions and focus on what matters to them.

 

"Your mind is your biggest weapon," Wood said. "When you journal, and when you write and when you do this consistently. That is when you'll see the change.

 

"We can't make you do it. This is all on you. This book is your tool to get to the next level."

 

The sisters said they interviewed hundreds of elite athletes, who confirm that 90 percent of success in sports is mental.

 

"There are 65 incredibly powerful sports lessons of all different sports," Wood said. "And on [right-hand page, facing each lesson] is the journal. When you write it down, your brain processes it 40 percent more. That's how it sticks, and that's how you'll eventually see the change.

 

"How you're going to notice the change is when you're playing a game, and something goes wrong — or even something goes right — and you learn to stay in the middle. You learn to manage your emotions. You understand you can control what you can control."

 

The concept of "controlling the controllables" was a key aspect of the pair's 45-minute presentation in the high school auditorium.

 

Connor asked the teens to throw out examples of things they can and cannot control about their experience in sports. Their attitude, work ethic, preparation and focus were in the controllable column. Weather, officials, jeering fans, on the other hand, are uncontrollable — as are wins and losses.

 

A couple of the student-athletes pushed back on the idea that wins and losses and statistics are not something that they can control, but Connor explained why they are not.

 

"You can influence [your stats], but what if you have the best defender in the state on you that day? What if your quarterback is having an off day?" Connor asked. "You cannot fully control your statistics. You cannot fully control winning. You can influence it, yes — by preparing, by hitting the weight room, by fueling your body the right way, by being a good teammate. But you cannot fully control the outcome.

 

"When you go all in on the 'can control' side, pressure disappears. You're in the present moment. … If you want to play your best, you have to be in the present moment. If you focus on things that are outside your control … you're going to have pressure, you're going to have a lack of confidence, you're going to start doubting yourself, you're going to make mistakes in the game, and one mistake is going to lead to another. So, when you're in this moment and you're stuck, ask yourself, 'Where is my focus right now?' "